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Bringing-up baby in the back of beyond…

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Baby, Bumps

Life in limbo…

Posted by CountryMunchkin on 16/06/201425/11/2015

Waiting for baby Johnson we took a little walk about the town, up the stunning Cecily Hill where the beautiful Cirencester Parish Church is visible from the top of the hill…

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Snapshot

Ah. The much-maligned pre-suppertime-desperation-get-everyone-out-of-the-bloody-house-before-someone-gets seriously-injured-or-divorced-good-lord-will-this-day-never-ever-end walk. At least it’s a bloody beautiful time of day. Cos it sure ain’t a peaceful one. #presupper #earlyeveningwalk #settingsun #sunset #sunsetthroughthetrees #gloucestershire #cotswolds #greenfields #november

Today I realised that things have changed. At least for me and Felix, that is. This morning, while I was getting him dressed and he was giggling at me and chattering away to me in his own peculiar gibberish, I found myself spontaneously and joyfully laughing with him and leaning forward to kiss him, saying: “I love you so much, little boy.” Anyone that knows me, and all that we have been through this year, will probably appreciate how big something like this is. I love my children so much, so much. But I haven’t felt so joyfully free and truly filled with happiness and love like that in so, so long. It was like lightness and warmth had just settled in my heart, and I saw all the gorgeous wonder that this boy was and couldn’t keep my love for him from literally bubbling out of my mouth. Today, I really, truly remembered what the ‘joy of motherhood’ actually is. #motherhood #babyboy #littleboy #toddler #happymummy #turningpoint #motheroftwins #pnd #lifewithtwins #lightinthedark

For the second attempt running, this was the closest I got to the #fridakahlo exhibition at @vamuseum. I wanted so much to see it, but it just wasn’t meant to be. Frida Kahlo has been a passion of mine since university, not least since a dear friend introduced me to her incredible talent and extraordinary life story when we were in a play together a hundred years ago. She reminds me of a time before London, before babies, before so many things. Kahlo was perhaps the epitome of the tortured artist, fatalistic and broken, fuelled by her pain to paint constantly, her self-portraits some of the most raw and beautiful depictions of a woman in turmoil. She remains one of the most important artists of the 20th century and one of most influential women in art. For reasons I can’t really explain, she has always made a real impression on me, not least because of her searing honesty, and the beauty of her work. She says: “I paint self-portraits because I am so often alone, because I am the person I know best.” #inspiredbyfrida #fridakhalo #v&a #londonmuseum #londonart #culturalappreciation #culture #londonculture #artists #femaleartists #icons #personalheroes

Time away from my babies is always bittersweet. On the one hand, it’s wonderful to have lie-ins, to make last minute plans, to travel light, to linger in restaurants and to dance to your own tune. But, on the other hand, the planning involved in going away is often monumental, the mental load of making sure that everything is thought about, all routines and specifics have been handed over, that you and your babies are prepared, is massive. And then there is the guilt, the missing of their tiny faces, the feeling when you return of knowing how long three days in their world really is. My time in London has so far felt like a holiday. And it has been much-needed. I can feel my mind settling, confidence and contentment returning. But, like with everything once you’ve become a mother, it doesn’t feel entirely without cost. Because, while I really needed a break from my babies, I have been reminded how much I really love them too. And how much I miss the smell of their hair, the sound of their giggles, the shape of their mouths, the look in their eyes, the feeling of their hands in mine. And how much that who I am now is so inextricably tied up with their very existence. Time away is just never the same, because once a mother, always a mother, and distance doesn’t really mean anything at all. #motherhood #metime #selfcare #toddlersofinstagram #twins #twinmama #motheroftwins #mummyholiday

Missing all my little people this morning - but my post-wedding hangover is also a good reminder that baby-free days are a wonderful thing. Thank goodness for grandparents, where would any of us be without them? Plus, pictures from home softening the blow somewhat. #tinypeople #twins #twinstagram #twinsofinstagram #grandparents #twinboys #siblings #pyjamas #bedtimegoingwell #happyfaces #hungovermummy

In London for the coolest wedding I’ve ever been too. From the fairy lit service, complete with exposed brick and bridesmaids in white tutus and glittery Converse, to the antipasti and pizza for dinner, and the striking Electrician’s Shop backdrop in Docklands, it felt so unique and so beautiful. A great reminder about love and commitment and being there for each other through the highs and the lows. #wedding #londonwedding #theelectriciansshop #docklands #babyfree #outout #friendsgetmarried

Days Gone By…

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